In the six months of our marriage, Elisabeth and I have made a habit of having a date night. Once a week we’ll go out somewhere – a movie, for dinner, a walk, or sometimes just stay at home – but regardless, we have chosen to just set apart some space for quality time together. After having lived apart for our entire dating period, this is a very welcome lifestyle choice. This past Friday night, after a nice meal at home, we went for a walk on the downtown mall. The night was crisp, but pleasant and after checking out some of the latest additions to the Pavilion, we headed to Escafe for some delicious organic coffee and the most amazing Creme Brulee either of us has ever experienced. If you ever visit us, remind us to take you there. It’s so good! By 9:45 we had just enough time to end up at Regal cinemas to watch “The Namesake.” Below is a description of the film.

“The story of the Ganguli family whose move from Calcutta to New York evokes a lifelong balancing act to meld to a new world without forgetting the old. Though parents Ashoke and Ashima long for the family and culture that enveloped them in India, they take great pride in the opportunities their sacrifices have afforded their children.”

The movie is beautifully filmed, with several artistic shots interspersed into the unfolding story (those of you with a photographic eye will appreciate it). It is a slower paced film, but moving. The story itself is engaging, and the acting well done. At several points I thought, “yeah, I know someone like that.” For those who have had some sort of cross cultural experience, there are several opportunities to cringe and to chuckle. In one scene, Gogol, the lead character played by Kal Penn, brings his white girlfriend home to meet his parents, and immediately she begins to unintentionally, yet repeatedly say or do culturally offensive things. The parents, having been in America for several years, recognize what is happening and handle the situation gracefully, though as an audience member, one can easily imagine the conversations that would ensue before bed. Kal Penn takes a big leap forward from several previous roles, effectively portraying the complexity of someone who has straddled two worlds all of their life, and suddenly comes to discover the depths of one world that has been around him, within him all along.

Being third culture kids, both Elisabeth and I were naturally attracted to such a film. It is fascinating to me, how that commonality can draw people together, even in profound ways, even if the nature or respective cultures are quite different. Such is the case of Elisabeth and I. I grew up in the frozen north, making snow forts, playing hockey, eating empanadas and speaking Spanish at home. Meanwhile, halfway around the world, there lived a young girl making her way as the only white girl among a sea of black faces, sweating in the noonday sun, drinking Bissap, and going to a French school. At face value, what would we have in common? We still, in fact, struggle with finding a common comfortable temperature at home. But beyond the cultural differences is a feeling, a feeling of being known and understood that transcends the food you eat or the way you plan your day (or don’t plan your day). With globalization increasing and deepening in various facets of life, such stories become more frequent and that feeling more universal. For me, that is great. For most of my life I have struggled with the idea of home as a physical place. But ask most people, and home is not really about a place, but about meaningful relationships, not necessarily with people who are like you, but who empower you to be who you really are. This is a beautiful thing.

Website: The Namesake
Watch the trailer.